Why Isn't There a Switch?

There really should be a switch. It's almost 2:00 a.m. and my mind will not stop. Sometimes it's in a good way, with never-ending ideas, but other times, it is in a BAD way-the things you can talk yourself into. How is it that our mind screws with us? Hey, isn't it supposed to work "with" you? How does an itch on my leg become my questioning my career path? How the hell does that happen?

It's also that damn caffeine. Brian and I make our daily trek for "linner" or "dunch"...that's what I call when we meet up between 4:30 and 5:30. We've both usually not had lunch yet-I'd continue to work as does he, so we have our one proper meal. They have the best darned iced tea-fresh brewed, 3 lemon wedges and 3 Sweet n' Lows. They got to the point that that give us a pitcher. I always, always think, "hey, it's early enough, I'll be okay by the time I go to bed." Now it's freaking 2:00 a.m., I've already watched the new "Mad Men" show and all that's left on my DVR are shows of "Psych" I've not felt like watching yet.

And then it goes...clean the home, what to do with the cat, what to do with my weight, what to do with my job, what to do with my creativity, what to do with my future, what to do with my runaway train of a brain (hey, I can even rhyme at this time of day!?). I went to my favorite, Google(tm), and googled "Runaway Train" and came up with the lyrics to Soul Asylum's song by the same name. I really don't watch videos anymore-but I looked on YouTube and remembered what this song was about-missing kids. Some of the lyrics at this time of the morning are prophetic: "So tired that I couldn't even sleep/...Runaway train never going back/Wrong way on a one way track/Seems like I should be getting somewhere/Somehow I'm neither here nor there..."

Well, watching that video, that does shake me back to reality. That's a serious issue-I just had a stupid itch on my leg! In the end, I know that I'm not missing, I'm not lost (possibly waylaid a bit from time to time), but just need to step back, put something soothing on the tv with the timer and just RELAX and put my mind on the same sleep timer...and hopefully it will switch off, and get ready for another day! Maybe I can replace the switch with a dimmer....

Pleasant Dreams to All,

Robin